don't you just hate it when your mind starts drowning in 'life is futile' thoughts? this is one of the scariest things to go through. everything seems to lose meaning. tomorrows seem never ending but also vast and greedy. it asks and asks but I feel like I have nothing to give. yet, it keeps demanding. what should I do? I have nothing, I am nothing. everything feels scary and useless. should I just give in now because there's no way I can make it till tomorrow. work feels like torture, being ambitious seems stupid. all the doubts I ever had are now cemented into the soles of my feet and drag me down. but the tomorrows still keep howling greedily and I am afraid. how do I move forward into the abyss when this present moment frightens me?
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