how many of you struggle with shaking off the claws of patriarchy?
I do.
every time I am home alone with dad and I feel like I have to ensure he has eaten lunch. "have you eaten? what did you eat? do you want me to make you something? you ate? okay, but do you want to eat again?"
all these questions when I sure as hell don't want to cook anything for anyone.
I don't ask my mom/aunt if they've eaten and what they would like me to make for them. because I assume they can find something to eat on their own.
my father can of course cook. and prepare something to eat for himself, which he usually does when we are alone. yet I feel pressurised to see to it that he has eaten.
this is to do with patriarchy and stupid unwritten rules that state a kitchen is the woman's domain. so all stomachs need to be fed by a woman.
sometimes, I deliberately stop myself from asking after my dad's state of 'kati bhok lageko cha?'
but GUILT.
2020 update: as of mid-late last year, I completely stopped asking after him. now the question is - am I a healthier person or a worse daughter?
I do.
every time I am home alone with dad and I feel like I have to ensure he has eaten lunch. "have you eaten? what did you eat? do you want me to make you something? you ate? okay, but do you want to eat again?"
all these questions when I sure as hell don't want to cook anything for anyone.
I don't ask my mom/aunt if they've eaten and what they would like me to make for them. because I assume they can find something to eat on their own.
my father can of course cook. and prepare something to eat for himself, which he usually does when we are alone. yet I feel pressurised to see to it that he has eaten.
this is to do with patriarchy and stupid unwritten rules that state a kitchen is the woman's domain. so all stomachs need to be fed by a woman.
sometimes, I deliberately stop myself from asking after my dad's state of 'kati bhok lageko cha?'
but GUILT.
2020 update: as of mid-late last year, I completely stopped asking after him. now the question is - am I a healthier person or a worse daughter?
